Sometimes, when I watch a movie, I go into this huge self-induced depressive state because I think about despite how far I've come, I'm still far away from working on those movies. I get envious of the people that made them, and wish I could have had even a small, insignificant role in making this movie. Harry Potter and Star Wars are two examples. So was this summer's Star Trek. I see the passion the filmmakers have, and want desperately to a) have that passion again and/or b) work on a film with people that passionate about it. Or I see certain films and just think about how much fun they would be, ie Pirates of the Caribbean (hello, wet Johnny and Orlando).
But then I remember. They don't get to watch and enjoy and fall in love with these movies like the audience does. Sure, they made it come to life, so they obviously have strong feelings for it, but they can never go to a theatre, surrounded by popcorn-munchers, and embrace this silly piece of film. They'll always think about the "behind the scenes" moments, the struggles, the script girl or PA they banged that day how much they hated that lead actor that the world adores.
Being an actor, I assume, is even worse. Sure their job is awesome because they play dress up all day and get to be different people (and really, we're all different people at work anyway), but how awkward would it be to have someone walk in and you're snuggled up on the couch, jacking off to your own love scene your face magnified on the screen in front of you from last summer's blockbuster? Or you're brought along to a friend of a friend's, and someone suggests watching that great Oscar nominated film before looking on the cover and noticing the uncanny resemblance.
This goes for being the friend/lover/spouse/family member of an actor as well, though it's a bit more acceptable... you can always claim you missed them and wanted to see their face. But seeing them on screen, vampire fangs protruded, you can't help but laugh as you think about the time you saw them snuggled with their best friend. And It's only a matter of time before you start wishing they'd bring those characters home with them sometimes and leaving the real them on set.
Aaakward.
photo courtesy of http://www.krix.com.au/Blog/archive/2007/10/04/13.aspx
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